Trump Maintains Double Life as Renowned Literary Scholar

Pictured: Donald Trump without his hairpiece and with his mustache disguise as his alter ego, literary scholar Archibald Craddidge

President-Elect Trump, a well known genius already among his voters – because, as everyone knows, you can't be a billionaire without being a genius – turns out also to be, according to a planned leak from his publicist, renowned literary scholar Archibald Craddidge, previously fabled to reside in a remote cabin on Nova Scotia. Mr. Trump's publicist was quick to remind WST reporters that the President-Elect is not the only world leader to also be a literary genius. According to state-run media, Kim Jong Un is the world's preeminent scholar of Korean literature, both historical and contemporary.

Trump is said to specialize in the literature of Mark Twain, with a focus on turning the U.S. Government into the living embodiment of Twain's trademark irony.